Couples therapy

Hitchin - Stotfold - Letchworth - Baldock - Stevenage

What is couples therapy?

Couples therapy is where you and your partner meet with a couples therapist to discuss the relationship difficulties that you are experiencing.

What are relationship difficulties?

Difficulties in relationships can take many forms; some of us find it difficult to experience intimacy within relationships, we may long for closeness but feel continually rejected by our partner’s want for distance. For others relationships may feel too close, the demands placed upon us in relationships leaving no room for our own lives. Some of us find that we have been able to form close and loving relationships but then something happens, a change or crisis in the life of one or both partners occurs and the relationship starts to suffer, communication and intimacy break down and we do not know how to find our way back to happiness. However your relationship difficulties have formed you may find that their persistence has a profound impact upon your life.

How do relationship difficulties affect us?

Relationships are key to our emotional wellbeing. From the very start of life we depend upon our closest relationships for our safety and security, we look to them to provide us with a sense of our identity and value, we rely upon them to encourage our growth and development.

Whilst it is true that as we get older we tend to become more resilient and independent we nevertheless continue to depend upon our relationships in important ways. When our relationships are unstable or abusive we tend to feel anxious and insecure. When we are critical of one another or seek intimacy outside of our relationships, we tend to feel less confident and question our value. When we do not work together for the betterment of both partners the growth and development of both individuals tends to suffer. Below is a list (not exhaustive) of some of the common negative effects of relationship difficulties:

• Work stress
• Self-esteem problems
• Anxiety
• Depression
• Anger issues
• Family problems
• Feelings of isolation and loneliness

When is it helpful to see a couples therapist?

Most of us will experience difficulties in our relationships at some time or other, life is full of challenges and our closest relationships often bare the brunt of the stresses that we experience. Some degree of conflict is inevitable and in fact healthy in relationships. However problems emerge when communication breaks down and we find that the strategies that we habitually use to overcome our relationship difficulties are no longer working. At such times it can be helpful to consult a professional with experience in helping couples to overcome their relationship difficulties.

What is involved in couples counselling?

The first step is to arrange an initial meeting with a couples therapist. During the initial meeting your therapist will ask you a little about your relationship difficulties, they will want to know about the nature and duration of those difficulties, as well as what both partners hope to achieve from the sessions.

The initial meeting is also an opportunity for you to consider whether you will feel comfortable and able to work with your therapist and to think with your therapist about how best to achieve your goals.

For further information about couples counselling and how it might be helpful for you and your partner please feel free to contact Hitchin Counselling and Psychology and a therapist will get in touch with you directly.

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